During my morning constitutional I found this scene at a favourite painting spot.
Now, I'm an old softy at heart. I believe in rehabilitation rather than punishment. I think mercy is the better part of justice. I do not favour the death penalty.
But people who fly-tip should be beaten to death with wire coat hangers.
Some of the gentler souls among you might find that opinion a little challenging, but hear me out.
The local authority provides a state of the art recycling centre that anyone can use for free, and they'll actually send someone in a truck to your house to pick up bulky items for a small fee. Someone who thinks it's a good idea to go to the trouble of hauling their household junk into the middle of a local beauty spot, in order to spread it around like a hippo marking its territory with faeces, therefore, is probably taking the micky, and should be taken out with extreme prejudice. No judicial process, just two behind the ear and a last journey to the nearest pig farm.
Ever have one of those veins throbbing in your forehead? I think mine's calmed down now, but my hands are still shaking.
On a similar note, I've seen pictures of graffiti tags on rocks in American national parks, miles from anywhere. Which means the perpetrators went to the trouble of carrying their spray cans through miles of beautiful wilderness in order to deface it. And of course, the savages in the east have taken to blowing up priceless art treasures and historical monuments.
Hmmm...perhaps there's some ideological component to these people's decisions to deface the natural world.
So there you have it: proof that fly-tippers are in league with Islamist extremists. Well, maybe not proof, but good enough, by the standards of today, to start waging war on them.
If that doesn't get the drone strikes lighting them up, I don't know what will.
Now, I'm an old softy at heart. I believe in rehabilitation rather than punishment. I think mercy is the better part of justice. I do not favour the death penalty.
But people who fly-tip should be beaten to death with wire coat hangers.
Some of the gentler souls among you might find that opinion a little challenging, but hear me out.
The local authority provides a state of the art recycling centre that anyone can use for free, and they'll actually send someone in a truck to your house to pick up bulky items for a small fee. Someone who thinks it's a good idea to go to the trouble of hauling their household junk into the middle of a local beauty spot, in order to spread it around like a hippo marking its territory with faeces, therefore, is probably taking the micky, and should be taken out with extreme prejudice. No judicial process, just two behind the ear and a last journey to the nearest pig farm.
Ever have one of those veins throbbing in your forehead? I think mine's calmed down now, but my hands are still shaking.
On a similar note, I've seen pictures of graffiti tags on rocks in American national parks, miles from anywhere. Which means the perpetrators went to the trouble of carrying their spray cans through miles of beautiful wilderness in order to deface it. And of course, the savages in the east have taken to blowing up priceless art treasures and historical monuments.
Hmmm...perhaps there's some ideological component to these people's decisions to deface the natural world.
So there you have it: proof that fly-tippers are in league with Islamist extremists. Well, maybe not proof, but good enough, by the standards of today, to start waging war on them.
If that doesn't get the drone strikes lighting them up, I don't know what will.
